There are specific legal restrictions around what details can be shared publicly. This includes media reporting, as well as posts made on social media by individuals. 

Under Section 71 of the Coroners Act 2006, until the coroner has confirmed the cause of death as suicide, no one is allowed to publicly share: 

• The method or suspected method of death 
• Any details (for example, where the death occurred) that might suggest the method 
• That the death was a suicide (it may only be described as a ‘suspected suicide’).

In some cases, people can apply to the Chief Coroner for an exemption from these restrictions, but this is not common.

Please note, if a journalist is writing about a coronial ruling, you will have no control over privacy. Unless there are reporting restrictions, the media can report the findings. 

Take your time. You don’t have to answer straight away – or at all. You can say, “I’m not ready”, or “We’re not speaking publicly at this time.” You can also nominate someone you trust to speak on behalf of your whānau if you’d prefer not to speak directly. 

 Here are some things to consider: 

• You may not have control over how your story is told. Once it’s published, it becomes part of the public record – this means the story will stay online and can likely be searched forever. 
• If you do share, think about which details you feel comfortable sharing, and what you’d prefer to keep private. 
• It’s okay to change your mind. You can decline future interviews or ask to approve quotes before they are printed (although not all media outlets will agree to this).

If you're thinking about speaking to the media about the person’s death, it’s important to go at your own pace and on your own terms. There’s no rush. Whether you want to share kōrero now, later, or not at all, your decision is valid. 

Here are some helpful steps to help you prepare: 

• Speak with your whānau beforehand. Together, decide what is and isn’t okay to share publicly. You might even write your story down first and remove any details you don’t want made public. 
• Choose a spokesperson to represent you if you prefer not to speak directly. This could be a whānau member, friend, kuia or kaumātua who is a little more distanced from the loss. They can sit with you during interviews or speak on behalf of your whānau. 
• Take your time. Don’t speak until you feel ready. If you're unsure, it’s okay to say, “Not now.” 
• Be clear and firm with journalists. Ask for their full name, media outlet and contact details. You can also request a list of questions before agreeing to anything. 
• If you feel pressured, pause. You can always say “I’ll get back to you” or ask someone you trust to respond on your behalf. 
• Consider issuing a one-off written statement. This can express your gratitude, grief, and request for privacy. You can share this with any reporters who contact you and let them know it will be your only comment for now. 
• Guide the kōrero. Let the reporter know how you’d like your story told. Emphasise what matters most to you, such as how the person should be remembered, the challenges they faced, or the message you want to share to help others. 
• You don’t have to answer every question. Focus on your key messages. It’s okay to say, “I don’t want to talk about that.” 
• Be mindful of what’s shared online. If the media outlet has a website, your story may remain visible for years to come. 
• Check your privacy settings on social media. Reporters can and often do use images or posts from social media without asking. Adjust your settings to protect what you want to keep private. 
• Be aware that images, quotes or videos you share may be reused in the future. This can happen around anniversaries, birthdays or public events (and sometimes without warning).

If you're interested to read about the expectation of journalists to report safely and respectfully, visit Media Guidelines for Reporting on Suicide. You can also read more practical advice in Comment or no comment?

Here’s a checklist you can use when preparing to talk to the media about the person who died by suicide (or suspected suicide). 

Before you respond

☐ Take your time. You don’t need to respond right away 

☐ Consult with your whānau - what do they think should be shared, vs. what should remain private? 

☐ Decide if you’d prefer someone else to speak on behalf of your whānau 

Setting boundaries

☐ Ask journalists for their full name, media outlet and contact information 

☐ Request to see a list of questions before agreeing to an interview 

☐ Set clear expectations about how the story will be shared and, if you wish, ask to approve quotes 

☐ Remember: it’s okay to decline or change your mind at any time 

Choosing what to share

☐ Think carefully about what you want to say 

☐ Supply a photo you want to share 

☐ Consider preparing a written statement 

☐ Focus on your key messages, and how the person should be remembered 

☐ Politely decline questions you don’t want to answer 

Protecting your privacy

☐ Check your social media privacy settings 

☐ Be aware that stories may stay online for years, and could be reshared without warning 

☐ Let journalists know how you'd like your story to be told 

Choosing not to share your story publicly is absolutely okay. Your silence is not a lack of care, it’s a valid choice. 

Keep in mind: 

• You are under no obligation to talk to the media. You don’t owe your story to anyone. 
• Saying “not now” doesn’t mean “not ever”. You can choose to speak later if it feels right. 
• No response doesn’t mean ‘no comment’. You can simply say, “We are not speaking publicly at this time.” 
• A written statement can be a helpful middle ground. It allows you to acknowledge the loss and ask for space, without needing to speak in person. 
• Check your social media privacy settings and talk with your whānau about being mindful when posting online. 
• Be aware that media attention may return, especially around anniversaries or inquests. Having a plan in place can help ease that pressure if it comes up again. 
• It's okay to take the time and space you need, and to grieve in a way that feels right for you and your whānau.