In the wake of suicide loss, you may find yourself struggling with suicidal thoughts. It’s not uncommon for people to think about taking their own life after someone close to them has died this way. You may feel like you’ve lost your purpose in life; yearning to be with the person who has died; searching for ways to escape the pain of their loss, or seeking ways to stay connected to them. 

These thoughts may come and go, or they may feel persistent. The important thing to remember is this: having suicidal thoughts does not mean you want to die. It may simply mean you're overwhelmed and need support. It can also be about having been exposed to suicide, trying to make sense of this, and what this means for you and your life. 

There is a big difference between thinking about suicide and acting on those thoughts – and help is available well before things reach a crisis point. If you are having suicidal thoughts: 

• Tell someone you trust how you’re feeling. You don’t have to have the perfect words. Just sharing can ease some of the weight. 
• Talk to your GP. Let them know what’s going on. If it helps, take a friend, kuia or kaumātua, or whānau member with you. 
• If you don’t feel heard, try again. Seek a second opinion or a doctor who understands you. 
• If you don't have a GP or want to chat anonymously, call a free helpline. See the list of options here.