This uncertainty can become a heavy part of your grief. 

There is an official process that takes place when someone dies in unexpected, sudden, or unclear circumstances. Police will notify the coroner, who is responsible for determining when, where, how, and why the death occurred. If a doctor or GP is unsure about the cause of death, they’ll also refer the case to the coroner. This may involve a post-mortem (autopsy) and, in time, a formal coronial report.  

But sometimes, even with these steps, the answers still feel incomplete. This can happen in cases of self-injury, overdose, or unclear intent – essentially, when it’s not possible to say for certain whether the death was accidental or intentional. 

Whatever the cause of death, your grief is valid. Your need for support remains just as important. You may need to be proactive about seeking help, especially if no support is automatically offered. It’s okay to reach out to people who will walk alongside you with care and without judgement.  

You may find comfort in connecting with others who have experienced similar uncertainty. If you feel suicide may have played a role in the person’s death, you might want to explore a suicide bereavement support group, such as WAVES or another local option. 

“My brother died of a drug overdose. He had used drugs for a long time and had depression. Our family didn’t know if his death was suicide or an accident. I was struggling with my grief and decided to try a WAVES suicide bereavement support group. The group members accepted me – they understood that fine line and how hard it is to get the answers you need.” — Carla

You don’t have to have all the answers to be supported. Whatever your story looks like, it’s okay to seek help, connection, and space to grieve.